to truly know me, i advise you read through this survey which will regularly be updated. it is 500 questions long. i promise you won't be disappointed. xxx
Name? my name will not be disclosed here. just call me pixie.
Name spelled backwards? eixip
What is your quest? to awaken to buddah inside of me and everyone else. i want blood of glitter and tea and i want my soul to be quenched with every waking and dreaming moment. i want to be filled with fairytales and dragons and goddesses. i think i'm halfway there.
Nickname? technically, pixie is a nickname. feel free to call me anything you'd like, though
Age? i am seventeen. i am never growing up.
Hometown? i live in a small village in pennsylvania - i have so my entire life
What were you born in? a hospital, like most of us fortunate americans.
Where do you live now? the sad tiny town with too many trees
Ever going to move? it is my destiny to leave, just as it was my destiny to live here. i may be going to rhode island soon, who knows
Would you rather live somewhere else? i want to live in arizona one day. the salty bones and pink cacti call for me
Birthdate? 9 june 1994
When do you blow out your candles? after i made my wish
Day you were born? a tuesday.
Zodiac sign? i am a proud double-gemini. i love anything and everything to do with astrology, i believe that it's the key to many people's personalities.
Do you know what that is? of course
Sex? grrrl
Height? 5'3''
Weight? it fluctuates. i will never be happy with my weight haha whoops
Eye color? big and blue
Hair color? naturally, my hair is a large spectrum of blondes. it's currently french-vanilla white.
Any siblings? when people usually ask me this question, i say i'm an only child simply because it's exhausting having to explain all of my step- and half-siblings! so yes, i do have a few.
Names and ages? i have no idea about ages, haha. i have four half-brothers: drew, ethan, anthony, and taylor. and two step-sisters: tyler and liberty
Do you get along with them? we don't talk often, if at all, but i would say we do!
Any pets? we have a baby parakeet.
Names? buddy. my grandpa named it, it was his birthday present
Parents? yes ma'am
Names? let's just call them mommy and daddy!
Do you get along with them? mommy is my best friend, things have always been pretty shaky with daddy
Married or divorced? they have never been married to each other! my mother has never been married period, and my dad's been married... two times? yes that sounds right
Website? you're on it silly! also any extra links thattaways under the 'exits' tab will be other things to check :)
Email? pixienaut@hellokitty.com :) contact me whenever you want!
Personality? i am a space cadet with a dumb vocabulary and lots of positive vibrations! i'm very nice, even though my thoughts are always floating around in the milkyway. (also, it's ok if you think i'm a hardcore stoner. everyone does.)
School
What school do you go to? i go to a dumb silly high school.
What year are you? senior, class of 2012
Hardest class? calculus, i only lasted two days. i'm not very good at logical things!
Easiest class? marketing
Most fun class? i really enjoy peace studies and sociology
What day did school start? it started late this year! we got hit by that nasty little hurricane and we had to start school three days later, on a thursday
Do you have classes with friends? yes! and if i don't, i make friends :)
Do you have friends? of course! not a lot of them, but the ones i do have are wonderful
Do you go to school events? not at all! i have not gone to one high school dance for the last four years
What was the last event you went to? a football game, 2+ years ago
Do you have school spirit? not at all. i have 'let's run away and never come back to this hellhole' spirit though
Do you go to dances? nnnnnopers
Relationships
Have a significant other? here we go. no i don't.
What is their name? n/a
How old are they? n/a
How long have you been going out? n/a
Have you been faithful? i am always faithful.
Have-you-ever ?
Smoked? never! i am looking forward to trying hookah with my friend, though
Stolen something? yes
Done drugs? ehh. yes. i don't like to classify weed as a drug though
Drank? yes
Gotten drunk? like, once. and it was very flimsy and funtastic!
Been dumped? um, it was sort of mutual.
Had someone be unfaithful to you? not love-wise
Hiked up a mountain? yes :) i love hiking! it's very freeing
Seen the Eiffel Tower? only through photographs
Met a celebrity? yes yes yes
Broken the law? yes i have
Ever loved someone so much it made you cry? yes (it's worse than it sounds)
Hated yourself? yes, i have been in many dark places in my life that i am not fond of looking back upon
Been brokenhearted? it wasn't brokenheartedness, it was sort of melancholic due to the fact that he will never be the same person who i met years ago
Broken someone’s heart? yes
Are you a virgin? yes
Done something really stupid? we all have, love
Favorites.
Guy name? ozborne, bandit, amos
Girl name? molly, polly, zoey, melody, maizie
Nationality? honestly, i have never thought of this before! i love everyone
Color? pink! all kinds of pink
Holiday? christmas and mardi gras
Day of the week? i love mondays and fridays :)
Restaurant? chinese buffets. yum yum~
Fastfood restaurant? dunkin donuts :)
Food? i like sweet japanese candies like pocky and yan yans and those little chocolate-filled pandas. i could eat those for days!
Animal? sloths and jellyfish
Pet? pretty kitty cat
Store? ac moore and rue 21
Mall? not picky
Clothes brand? :o they are irrelevant to my life! brandnames are so very silly
Soda? diet coke and ramune
Alcohol? i like anything sweet! wine coolers, metropolitans, etc.
Instrument? mandolin, ukulele, synth, and the human voice :)
Season? sweet lovely chilly snow-sprinkled winters
Number? forty-two
Radio station? i am very enamoured by the jonsi radio station on spotify, currently
Song? i very much like
braille and
somebody i used to know and
radio protector
Sport? i don't very much like sports
Vacation spot? switzerland
State? arizona
Country? switzerland :)
Flower? roses. and i leave this quote from
le petit prince:
'“I thought that I was rich, with a flower that was unique in all the world; and all I had was a common rose. A common rose, and three volcanoes that come up to my knees--and one of them perhaps extinct forever… That doesn’t make me a very great prince…”
And he lay down in the grass and cried.
'
Thing to do? oh gosh where do i begin :) i like drinking tea during really cold days, where the cold chills my spine and there is a constant war of hot and cold inside of my body. i like writing fairytales in pink glittery ink with my stuffed animals. i like cuddling with my friends as we watch movies. cassie ainsworth once said:
'i like what i like, but i love everything.
'
Actor? matt smith
Actress? kirsten dunst
Saying? not exactly a saying, but this quote from
alice in wonderland changed my life dramatically.
'Alice asked the Chesire Cat, who was sitting in a tree, "What road do I take?"
The cat asked, "Where do you want to go?"
"I don't know", Alice answered.
"Then," said the cat, "it really doesn't matter, does it?"
'
Car? i like bikes
Month? december :)
Cartoon? oh goodness, all i watch are cartoons! futurama, avatar: tla, tons and tons of anime (way too many to list), my little pony, powerpuff girls,
T.V.Show? skins uk, the office, bob ross
Website? i quite like tumblr
Book? :) hmm. looking for alaska, the little prince/le petit prince, any book by SARK, the many adventures of winnie the pooh, alice in wonderland, junko mizuno comics, hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy, the phantom tollbooth
Quality about yourself? my openmindedness
Your best friend? hades and pocahontas
Fruit? strawberries hehe
Language? french
Magazine? i don't read magazines
CD? razia's shadow by forgive durden
What’s your opinion on sex without emotional commitment? well. like that is just what “sex” is. but to me, sex should become love-making. it should be all about the emotional commitment. i personally abhor the fact that sex can exist without emotional commitment :(
Have you ever been romantically attracted to someone physically unattractive? of course, the inside really is important to me
Do you think the opposite sex finds you good-looking? it all depends on the eye of the beholder!
Would you be willing to give up sex in exchange for an emotional commitment you knew would last? yes of course, but i'd totally dig a place with both
Do you laugh when you hear or read the number 69? yes hahaha. i love really dorky sex jokes. i think i'm a twelve year old sometimes
Were you lying about your answer to the previous question? no, i almost never lie
Have you ever wished you could experience being the other gender? just for a moment! i quite love being a girl though
What do you love most about the other gender? their hugs
What do you dislike most about the other gender? they are not girls
What do you understand least about the other gender? the macho image they have to uphold
Do you believe in the traditional view of Heaven and Hell? i believe in reincarnation and the idea that when we finally reach an ideal being, we float on forever with all of our friends and we'll be in permanent bliss. so, i guess not
Do you think God has a gender? no, it is a force
What song(s) are constantly in your head? a lot of 80s jams!
What song(s) do you think describe your personality best? this one (during the pixie dark ages) and
this one (the current me)
If the object of your affections were to serenade you, what song(s) would you hope he or she used? songs are songs are songs :) if you took the time out of your day to sing something to me, i would be enamored in any way
What movie(s) do you love that nobody else seems to? Once.
Do/Are/Who’s?
Religious? no, i am very spiritual
Try to be fashionable? i try to be me (read: extremely tacky with loads of sequins and old lady clothes and bindis and bluh bluh)
Think fashion is important? expression is important
Get along with your family? very much so, even if they don't really get me
Get along with your friends? i would believe so
Know any foreign languages? i am learning french and icelandic
Do you trust people easily? i trust everyone. even you
Do you play an instrument? i play the ukulele, guitar, piano, and a liiiiittle bit of the violin
Know what you want to be when you get older? coffeeshop/teashop/hookah bar owner
Ever been out of state? of course
Out of the country? nope
Do you like to travel? love it~
What do YOU think of the way you look? i think i look like me. wow
What do YOU think about your attitude? i am not mean or nasty or anything. i think i'm a little lazy though. people tire of that quickly
What do you think about karma? 100% exists. it's all about balance. i don't depend on it or anything, i don't base my entire life around karma, but i certainly do believe in that whatever goes down, must come back up, and vice versa. you get what you put out
What do you think about love? i think love is the most raw and purest form of emotion and thus should be treasured :)
What do you think about fate? i don't know if i really believe it or not, but i really have a love-hate relationship with the entire concept of fate! everything feels fruitless if you believe in fate, imo. i mean, that means that everything has been chosen for you advance, and that is so sad. but the other side is that something out there will always be there for you to explore, which is really exciting!
What do you tell yourself if times get hard? that my future is meant to be beautiful and whatever goes down must come up
What would you give your life for? my mom
What do you think about your first love? i'm over him, but i will always love him. does that make sense?
What do you think about the first person that loved you? ^ he's very wonderful when he wants to be. he's hilarious and has really goofy hair and he loved me conditionally at one point. and i did as well. it's exhausting talking about him
What are you scared of? minimally, moths terrify me. on a larger, more widespread scale, i'm terrified of being alone
Do you cry easily? i cry at everything
What was the saddest moment of your life? when i nearly ODed last year
Do you think love is once in a lifetime, or just chance? there wouldn't be seven billion people in the universe if you could only love once. that would be cruel
Who do you trust the most? hades and pocahontas, again
Do you have any piercings? just my ears
Do you have any tattoos? not yet :)
Labels: 500, hades, pocahontas
i feel very rushed, like i'm trying to beat a record. my heart feels like a little ticking timebomb. i've been massaging migraines out of my brain all afternoon. i whisper "i'm listening" to my body and i just want to hear a response. but it throbs and hurts, and i don't know why. it's been a long time since i've felt like this. everything around me feels so severe and everything has a pulse. sometimes my emotions hurt more than help.
it takes 27 days to create a habit. i will have to write in this blog every day for the next 24 days for it to become said habit. i'm really excited! i have something to work towards, and one day, something to look back on.
i ride the bus to and from school. i don't have my permit or my license, partly out of laziness and partly out of my severe phobia of driving. i do not trust myself (or anyone else) driving five-tonne metal coffins. i wish i could drive by bicycle. i miss riding my little pink bike. it even has a pokemon card on the spokes of the wheel!
flit flit flit flit~ anyways, i was on my way home today from school today. i was singing
a song in my seat, all by myself, and i was laying across the seat and my hair was on the dusty old floor and i was facing my friend. i stretched out my arms and let my fingers brush through my tangly, dready hair. she looked down at me and started laughing. i stopped singing and curiously asked her what's so funny. she said, "you really just love doing your own little thing, don't you?" i smiled a toothy grin and replied, "i think you just described my entire life in one sentence."
i have another friend. i feel like i'm going to talk about her a lot, so i'll go with the codename chloe. i've known chloe since the first day of school last year. we both decided to sit at the same lunch table. my hair was frizzy and pink and adorable and everyone was staring at me and pointing and snickering under their breath. i unpacked my lunch (it was only apples! i remember this!) and sat right next to the windows so i could watch the clouds. it's as close as i could get to actually being outside. chloe sat across from me that day. she had shoulder-length natural brown hair and big milky brown eyes that stared into your soul. square-framed glasses were perched on her nose and big dangly earrings flowed down the sides of her face. she liked tapping music with her fingernails. but most importantly, she looked nervous. she still looks nervous. chloe has not changed since the day i met her.
naturally, i introduced myself. she told me her name and it turned out that we had the same class together for fifth, sixth, and seventh period! wow! (it's a three period, three-hour business course, jsyk. i will be talking about that a lot too.) i was simply thrilled to find a friend in this class, but she didn't look so excited. i was used to this. i am always more excited than they are when it comes to hanging out. we walked to class together and i did most of the talking, with her simply nodding and intercepting for an occasional eyebrow raise. chloe wore a pencil skirt and business suit jacket. she looked very professional and very adorable. she has such a simple and modern style that not a lot of people can pull off without being 'boring'. i think she's lovely.
chloe's mind is always running. we can talk without speaking. our glances from across rooms speak volumes. we are constantly trying to figure each other out, and it's bloody obvious. we can spend hours staring at each other without breaking off the gaze, and simply have full conversations with our soft breaths and big round eyes. sometimes when i look at her, i want to cry. she will never stop thinking and filling up her body with toxic thoughts and energies. i want to shake her and shout, "you are beautiful! you are in charge of your life! stop forgetting about the beauty!" she's one of those people who is upset that roses has thorns, rather than feeling blessed that thorns have roses.
i have a lot of stories about chloe, but i think i am going to read and take a nap. there may be a mini-update later. :) namaste
xxx pixie
Labels: chloe, marketing, timebomb in my brain
bonjour!
:) i'm pixie and i have big alien moon eyes and french vanilla hair. i am surrounded by cosmic bullshit every day of my life and it's totally wicked. and this is my blog.
i decided to start a blog because i want something to look back on one day and say, "wow, my life was totally psychadelic!" i also enjoy sharing my knowledge with everyone about everything. my brain is filled with tea and glitter and i am overwhelmed with my love of everything.
i am seventeen years old in the boonies of pennsylvania. i feel like i am definitely part-deer, i enjoy running in the middle of the road and sleeping in the grass and painting spots on my body. i am a senior in high school. school is exhausting and very silly. i don't do very well. i skip classes to read outside a lot. i feel like i learn more from my novels than i do in the classroom. i am a b-average student, and that is okay with me!
i am on my way to college in a few months, i will be going to johnson and wales university in miami if everything turns out right. i will be majoring in baking and pastry arts and food entrepreneurship. i am really excited for this. a whole bunch of new experiences will be in the palm of my hand :) wow
my dream job is to open a tea shop/hookah bar in a quiet town with people who have cacti growing from their ears and stardust billowing from their brains. i want to meet people who love everything as much as i do. i want to wake up every morning and make croissants and donuts and crepes. i will organize my teasets and create cappuchino masterpieces with steamy milk. there will be giant chairs and couches that people can melt in. every corner of my store will have fairy lights and the ceilings will be painted by customers. i will have regulars who want black coffee and a pinch of organic sugar and i will never be alone.
my entire life is a drug. i am high off of cookie dough, incense, buttons, words, hula hoops, cupcake-scented lotion, chipped teacups, crackly radios, and clocks that go too fast. i’m such a tea junkie that i piss it. i’m such an everything junkie, really, i choose it all! i want to suck all of the marrow out of life and live as beautifully in each moment as I can. i play a ukulele with a lot of stickers, practice yoga during full moons, lucid dream nightly, read tarot cards for strangers, and align myself with the stars and moon. i believe in unicorns and faeries and magic, mostly magic, because my entire life is magic. i can see auras. mine is a rainbow sunbeam. i’ve always considered myself a moonchild. i frolic and thrive underneath skies of diamonds and aliens. i find delight in wiping the moon glitter out of my eyes and braiding moonshells into my brain and opening my arms and embracing the milky glow of the atmosphere. the frosty cosmos of the night that tangles up in me is unlike any other.
now for controversial things: i am pansexual. i have been in love with one person, ever. sometimes i still think i'm in love with him, but i think i'm just in love with the idea of him. it's ok. i’m a buddhist-teaist-pantheist-hindu-meghanist who worships love and the universe, believes in aliens, ghosts, shamans, faeries, spirits, and most of all, myself. the cosmic goddess, the bubble-blowing stars, and the tea-filled craters helps us become everything, even for just a small tiny moment. i am pro-choice, pro-soldiers, and pro-naps. i do not judge.
we are all the same.
i wear bindis and live in thrift shops. my entire life is in my bag. it holds my gummybear tarot card deck, hello kitty eightball, gel pens, lipstick (lots of it!), extra shoelaces, 3+ journals, books i am reading (currently: the search for wondla. it's really lovely so far), watercolour paints, stray jewelry, jangly change, and ibuprofen. i throw glitter on myself daily. i let my hair dry naturally. i wear cowboy boots a lot. i make a lot of my own clothes. stores don't usually have what i like!
i am emotion. my belly is filled with feelings and gurgly milk all the time. i am indecisive and fragile and a buried treasure. my mind hums every second with thoughts and sing-a-longs and metals and calming. i like e.e. cummings and alien noises. music fills me up and makes me cry. i read a lot of children's books and only watch cartoons because i have peter pan syndrome. it's chronic!
i am a weird girl. i know that. but i am happy and alive and i breathe the milky way. i am just like you except my name is pixie. my hair is too long and my words are too short. but, i guess that's why i'm here. i guess that's why we're all here.
thank you for reading. hopefully you'll all find out more about me through this blog and maybe find out a little about yourselves too :)
xxx pixie
Labels: intro
